
Dear Mr Ffarriols Calvo, Rafael
Allow me to place my hand on your chest.
My name is OOLEEOO 2, son of EEWAANII 1. I have not had the honour of addressing you before, since until 2,4561 years ago (measured in your time) I was on UMMO, the planet I come from. I have recently been posted to your beautiful country with the mission of re-establishing a contact deliberately broken off on the imperative orders of my brothers, to whom I am voluntarily subject. I have in my possession all the DEEGOO containing a precise description of the whole history of our incorporation (98,456% of the time passive) into your beautiful OYAGAA. I also possess a detailed psychosomatological description of you and of all your brothers who have had more or less close contact with our culture. My expeditionary brothers who were in contact with you ask me to convey to you their heartfelt greetings. You cannot form even a remotely approximate idea of the sadness that overcomes us when we must abandon missions in which affections and feelings are involved. This is due to the peculiar structure of our brain, in which, besides an evolution of the corpus striatum and the thalamus far superior to yours, the GOOYOODOO (a part of the brain equivalent to what you call the Circle of WILLIS) has developed considerably in our species. This sub-organ is responsible for what your most intelligent brother Miguel Unamuno called “Sentient Intelligence” [U-C Note: it was not Miguel de Unamuno but Xavier Zubiri], and which your brother neurologists are close to discovering on your planet. In fact some American educationalists and psychologists have already begun to devise tests (on empirical rather than scientific bases) that correlate intelligence and feelings. Check this for yourself by simple observation of the different animal species that share existence with you.
The greater the intelligence, the greater the sensitivity
But moreover (and this is partly unknown on OYAGAA) sensitivity feeds back into intelligence, not only by providing more information but also BETTER information, thus placing brains on a quantum plane perceptible by the BUAWA BIIAEI, which will prompt a mutation of the species through certain specific individuals, true “biological pioneers”. ![]()
Mr Rafael: With restrained emotion we have studied your book EL HOMBRE, EL COSMOS Y DIOS (MAN, THE COSMOS AND GOD), which we found excellent: it is commendable and moving to watch an OEMMII of OYAGAA struggling with dignity and tenacity amid the stormy waters of prevailing ignorance. Our hand on your chest, sir. Nevertheless (and we beg you not to take what follows as a criticism) we earnestly invite you to go over the following documents: THE COMMUNIST MANIFESTO (Karl Marx and Friedrich Engels), and Gauss's calculations and the implications of the so-called Gaussian plane for representing graphically what you call “complex numbers”.
We knew with a high degree of certainty of the possibility of victory of your brother J. M. AZNAR in the democratic elections of the country of Spain. That is why my brothers warned you of the riskiness of certain investments before the first half of this year. If you ask expert investors they will tell you the number of business ventures that have failed or come to nothing in the last two years. We believe with a high degree of reliability that a good moment for investment is approaching, but only if one knows how to choose the right fields and moments and lets oneself be advised by experts.
Mr Farriols: There is a risk of a fresh outbreak of equine fever in your country. Take precautions.
Mr Farriols: We wish to know whether you are willing to help us restructure the AYUYISAA (Network) of your country. For this it would be of great help to us (we will reimburse your expenses) if you would ask personally ALL those who have had reasonably close contact with the UMMO civilization about their possible interest in taking part again in the study of our civilization. For this you may use the telephone channel between 5 JULY and 28 August 1996. There will be no risk of unauthorized eavesdropping. You may ask your brother PONS for help.
Mr Rafael, I place my hand on your chest. Please convey our respect to your YIEE and to your devoted brothers.
Dictated by: OOLEEOO 2 Son of EEWAANII1